An American in Provence

Last Sunday Alain and I went to visit the Abbaye de Silvacane, between Salon and Aix, about 45 minutes from here.
It was a nice afternoon. We got there and spent 2 euros to park, then 6.50 each to visit the Abbey. It was quite lovely but there was no guide. They were having a string concerto that night. When I saw the ad I said "oh! We should stay for that." Then saw the price, another 20 euros each, and said, Oh, never mind.
It is one of three Cistercian abbeys in the area, the other two being Abbaye de Sénanque and
Abbaye du Thoronet. (not a monk ---->)

It was founded in 1144 on the site of a Benedictine monastary. The name comes from "forest of reeds" (silva canorum). It was very austere, and had about 16 monks back in the day. After the revolution it became state property and was used as a farm, and now transformed back into a tourist attraction. Whoops, I mean abbey.
There was a strange light table/stained glass exhibition of light tables. The theme seemed to be science and the universe, so the designs were supposedly scientific/artistic representations of concepts like neutrons. For my two cents, it was a lot of piffle. We stayed about an hour and then left. I imagine in winter it was pretty cold as the only fireplace was in the room where they worked on the manuscripts.

I got my hair cut on Thursday. This was the third or fourth time that I have gotten it cut here in France. I had cut out a page from a magazine with a style that I liked, as I find that is more helpful in explaining what I want.
I decided to try a new place this time, as the last place was really expensive (27 euros). There is at least one beauty salon on each block. And by block I mean one side of the street between two side streets. I don't see how they all keep in business. I guess either a) French women go a lot more often to the beauty parlor, or b) the salons charge a lot more to make up for it. I am guessing a mixture of the two.
I saw the list of prices on the sign outside. transformation- 12.50. Okay, good I just want that. I don't need my hair shampooed and styled for another 20 euros, I just need it cut.
I go in and say I want my hair cut. They then proceed to lead me over and wash my hair. I guess I need to be more forceful about these things. No, just CUT!!!!
While I am covered in suds, the teenager washing my hair and smacking her gum asks if I want the cream. I don't know, do I want the cream? Do you want me to want the cream? (Of course she wants me to want the cream- it is five euros a glob as I find out later when paying my bill. Thanks for that!) I figure it is some sort of conditioner and say yes. I guess it was some sort of color enhancer.
I get toweled off and lead over to the chair. And search frantically in my purse for my magazine clipping, which is not there. Panic and consider bolting wet-headed out the door. Um, quelques centimeters? She starts to cut and I start to worry. Whoa that is short!
She finishes cutting and starts to style it (another ten euros).
It is of course, very important to pay attention during this part so that you can try and try and try and drive yourself crazy trying to recreate the same look every morning at home for the next two months until you get it cut again. It is no use- you can buy the same brushes, creams, and hairdryers, and you will never acheive it.
The secret? I am about to reveal to you why.
Are you ready?
The reason is, gentle readers, is that you, unlike hair stylists, do not have a third arm.
Yes, it is true. It is hidden back there behind the chair so that you cannot see it in the mirror, but it is there. That is how they manage the curling iron, hair dryer and flat brush at the same time. So, you might as well just give up. Or get your hair professionally styled every day. Or grow a third arm. It is up to you.
The lady did flatter me by saying that I have a very nice hair color and that it is a color that all the Frenchwomen envy.
So I paid, 30 euros. Way to save money by switching salons Megan. The hair color compliment only marginally lessened the blow.
My hair looked Super Cute Thursday afternoon until I took a shower to wash off all the hair pieces, and that was the end of it.
So sad.

Well, here it is. The better (tasting) of the two loaves I made. I took the better looking one to Alain's parent's, not having tasted either of them. Since they were so thick and I used so much flower, they weren't completely cooked. Josée, bless her heart, tried to save it (like she did with my apple pie attempt) by putting it in her REAL OVEN longer, but it just turned out like burnt biscuits. Sigh. I think the problem was I didn't let the dough rise enough, and I added too much flour (about two times as much). Not having made bread before, I wasn't sure what the dough was supposed to feel/look like, so I just kept adding flour. Whoops.
On a happier note, I finally found baking soda today. Bicarbonate. I had to ask one of the stockers, repeating myself several times. Luckily, I didn't have to resort to pidgin French and wild hand movements. It was over with the salt. Why don't they put all of the baking items together? No idea. Still haven't found baking powder. If anyone knows what that is in French, please tell me.
The French seem to be very suspicious people. Everytime I go through the checkout, I have to show my bag or purse. Yes, because I am going to put $40 of groceries on the belt and steal five apples. It seems to be equal opportunity suspicion, as old ladies, young boys, everyone seems to be asked to show their bag. Do you want me to turn out my pockets too?
Alain and I are invited over to his aunt's for Sunday lunch. I think I won't attempt any of my creations. Or at least I will make one the day before and see how it turns out before inflicting them on anymore of his relatives. I do want to be invited back you see.

This just in- I found it! Hahahaha.
http://www.beyond.fr/food/eng_french_food_dict_1.html
baker's yeast levure de boulanger
baking powder levure chimique : One "sachet" (11g packet) is about 2 teaspoons.
baking soda bicarbonate de sodium

I must say that I feel quite gratified that I am not the only foreigner in France with this problem.
From the blog Accidentally French

Whether it is due to getting married or living in France, my barely existent what may pass as domestic skills have been stirred.
After the, ahem, interesting attempts at apple pie were managed, I decided to make cinnamon bread today.
Only I didn't know that it would be enough for an army.
I found a recipe online. I was searching for something that doesn't require baking soda or baking powder, as apparently those are not available in France. I finally found one. I was actually able to convert into metric units (yay allrecipes.com !), which was nice. I should have however read the rest of the recipe. Rolling pin? Nope. Argh. Alain, do we have a rolling pin? Nope. But we do have wine bottles. We emptied out one and used it for rolling. The dough didn't seem to want to rise. I hope that what I put in there was yeast. The raisins we had are as hard as rocks, so I decided to leave them out too. So, two kgs of flour later, I was ready to put the un-rised dough into a greased pan. Greased with what? Butter? Olive oil? Vegetable oil? I took a guess at vegetable oil. We shall see. It turns out that the bread pan that I bought is about 1 cm too big to fit into our toaster oven. Perfect.
I am taking my creation over to Alain's parents tonight.
Maybe I should buy a bread machine.
And figure out where in the world I can buy baking soda and powder.

I think that in our new place we will need to install a kitchen, kind-of like the self-cleaning toilets. You step out, close the door, push a button, and WHOOSH! the place is immediately hosed down and drains through a hole in the floor. Forget aprons, I need one of those suits that people where when they go into class 5 infectious disease areas, covered from head to toe.

Creativity- Terrific quality for a good cook. Terrible quality for a bad cook.

And now, starring my favorite chef, making dough.

Despite this slightly disturbing picture, I think it accurately expresses the feelings of many ex-pats...

Big soft salty warm mall pretzels
Bagels with cream cheese or hummus
Cottage Cheese
Chunky peanut butter
Hershey's in general
Hershey's with Almonds
Peppermint Patties
Moose Tracks Ice Cream
Grape Soda, Root Beer
Starburst, Skittles
Oreos
American Imitation Chinese food, compared to French Imitation Chinese food
Softees from Wendy's
Big crunchy pickles with or without Lemonade (my favorite snack in elementary school)
Cadbury Eggs
Hot Apple Cider
Banana Cream jello (to be made into pies)
Those chocolate oranges
Chocolate syrup and chocolate fudge for ice cream (preferably chocolate)
Biscuits
AMERICAN APPLE PIE!!! I just can't get the darn thing right over here!!!!

lots of other junk that I can't think about but I am sure I would say Oh yeah I miss that! if walking through the standard American grocery store.

Yep. I know what I will be doing the first week back in the US. And it isn't healthy. I guess I need to loose about five pounds before going just to come out even at the end.

It doesn't help that there are companies such as this one
http://www.cybercandy.co.uk/aaasmt/
that you can order candy or soda or peanut butter in bulk for an arm and a leg. I think it would be cheaper to take a weekend trip to New York. "Oh, what did you see when you were in New York?" Uh, the inside of a grocery bag.

Wish that a) there was a commissary here in Marseille
and that b) I had access to it.

Other countries can make a lot of foods better than the US- cheese, bread, cakes, etc. but gosh darn it I am sticking up for my country and not ashamed to say it-
America has the best candy in the world and I am proud of that fact by-god.
There. I have said it.
That could be a negative but who knows.

The Association of American Wives of Europeans club, which is based in Paris and of which I am a new member (thanks Genevieve) has a little blurb in their handbook.



Are they joking? Any "spare room" in my suitcase that isn't taken up with presents, things mom and dad have threatened that I had better take back with me to France or else they are throwing out (No!!! Mr. Snuffles!!!!) and odd items like cheap drugstore mascara that might as well be Chanel for the price it is here, are going to be food items FOR ME. No way am I parting with my hard-earned candy. Hey, I braved holiday airport traffic for this candy bar lady, you are prying it from my cold dead fingers.

Foods I Don't Miss:
Just about nothing.